“Hey, Ray…..Think you’d be up to putting down a few stepping stones when you are out at the hall in May?”
That is the exact text that I sent to poor Ray (and by extension, his wife, Bobby). He says he is going to frame that text. I think I’m going to have it put on a plaque and dedicate the entire patio to them. And yes, it is ALL MY FAULT. I own it and I will say it again and put it in writing. IT. IS. ALL. MY. FAULT. There, Kelly, feel better?
Kelly had been eyeing the side yard up for the past couple years. She wanted to fence it or put up a large dog run so that we could just open the back door and let the dogs out into a safe enclosure without having to constantly walk them around the property. I kept resisting (fencing costs too much; a dog run might blow over; it would be unattractive etc.) Then this year, we purchased these really cool topiary dividers from an auction (what else is new, right?) and started daydreaming about where to put them. We both eventually came around to “wouldn’t it be cool to use them to make a small secluded outdoor area for us and guests to enjoy the serenity of the sunsets?” Then we considerately thought of Charles, the lawn guy and thought that it would make his job more difficult to get around these things, so maybe if we had a more permanent area such as a small deck or patio and use these as privacy or shade, that would work. Pricing out lumber vs. pavers vs. stepping stones, we determined that a patio was the more cost effective way to go. Just a small patio outside the back door for a couple chairs and maybe a table (about 100 sq. feet). Then I realized that well, that will look silly and so small; we should expand it to the other back door so that we can eventually open both doors and really increase the flow of the house; let’s do this patio not as a square, but more of a rectangle. What’s a little more sand, gravel and a few more stepping stones? (about 250 sq. feet). Then, I think….well, might as well expand it back to a square and cover the entire area from the back of the house to the apartment area. A nice, easy square (800 sq. feet). Ok. That’s good. Let’s stop there.
But wait, there’s more…..look at that great flow we have from the house, but the porches are being rebuilt this year and wouldn’t it be great if our guests could walk down a couple steps from the front porch right onto the patio and have a little walkway around? That’s just another 220 sq. feet and it makes so much sense! Hmmm….you know, if we just pull that out a little more and expand the entire patio another 6 feet out or so, then it makes so much more sense; for a party, we could use the porches, guests could walk down from the porch or the back front hall door or out the back side door onto the patio and we could have an awesome area for chairs, tables, events etc. So then that extra 6 foot pull out? That added an extra 300 sq. feet which brought us to….yes class? Anyone been following my girl math here? That brings us to 1300 sq. feet, give or take. And that, my friends, is how a little patio turned into, as one FB friend noted, a patio larger than some people’s houses.
